"Thirty percent of college men say they would rape if they could get away with it. When the wording was changed to "force a woman to have sex" the number jumped to 58%. Worse still, 83.5% argue that "some women look like they are just asking to be raped." "
-Margo Maine, PhD. (Body Wars)
How did we get to this? What happened in our society that the lines of "what is considered rape" are so blurred? Anytime a person says NO, objects in ANY way, pushes you away, asks you to STOP or is unconscious for whatever reason and you continue...that is rape.
According to a study conducted by Rogers University, 84% of women know their assailant. They've also deduced that women between the ages of 16-24 are four times more likely than women in any other age group to be a victim of rape, and one out of every four college women have experienced a rape or an attempted rape. Now men are not only admitting that they would rape if they knew they could get away with it, but that they have not already committed a rape, and 65% of those times that rape was with a group. Is it peer pressure? Do these men have a serious lack of control in their life that they need to seek out to control a woman? Do they honestly believe that woman was "asking for it" or is that just an excuse?
Over the past few years stories have been surfacing of women being raped on their college campus and ultimately being discredited by the administration. More specifically a story that has stuck with me about a freshman at Amherst College in Massachusetts who was raped by a guy who lived in her dorms and was not only told she couldn't switch dorms but that she should "take a year off and work at Wendy's until he graduates" Eventually this situation ended in this student leaving, a faculty member resigning and a school wide investigation.
Think about it? Doesn't it make sense? It does but a lot of times when guys see things like this they become defensive. They're thinking "We're not all like that" and "It happens to us too" And they're absolutely right. Just like with everything else in the world, some select people give the rest of their race, religion or sex a bad name when they're not all bad. I know we think of rape as a crime committed against women but the truth is 92,700 men are raped in the U.S. each year. Do they not deserve justice too?
A lot of rape victims avoid accusing their rapists for many reasons. They think it was their fault, they think they were asking for it, they are sometimes ashamed. Lets stop making these victims feel ashamed and make them feel empowered. Just know, it is not your fault and you are not alone.
Consider visiting these sites to get more information, find out how you can help, or if you yourself are a victim.
or call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
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